New year

Second day of the new year and I really don't feel any different, maybe a little tired because I am apparently getting to old to stay up past my bedtime which as of late had been like 9 pm. I know sad huh. I have enjoyed spending time with my husband. We have had a couple of days where it is just us and it has been fun. Gotta get back on track with the plan we were using after we finished the financial peace university, paying all four walls, using cash only. Learning to be content staying home and cooking. I really don't like cooking but I like cooking more than feeling the way o have been feeling this past week. My stomach has been upset because of all the pre processed foods that I have been eating . It is amazing how soy can hurt you if you are allergic to it as I am.

No new years resolutions per se. I always break them anyway. Gonna go for little steps instead. Oh I do want to read more. Looking forward to that.

More later, not that anyone reads these. More just for me at this point.

Small Groups

Small Groups are a JOKE!!!! just saying

Growth

So God is working on me and my selfishness . I got to walk around with my sister and shop for my nieces and nephews. She was blessed by a fifty Dollar gift card to the holiday store at Henderson Hills Baptist Church. Gina was able to get lots of stuff for her kids. She also has some friends that hither kids stuff and apparently went "overboard" on the gifts. This will just show the kids that they are loved. Gina is also being taken out to go shopping with that same friend. I am glad that Gina is being ministered to. Brings joy to my heart up know that people love her and are listening to God and blessing others that are connected to Gina.

shopping

So tonight I get to go shopping with my sister. She is a single mom who got blessed by a gift card from Henderson Hills Baptist Church. She is going to be able to purchase gifts for her four kiddos. She is very excited about this I am excited to go with her as well. It will be weird being with Gina without the four kids it will be much quieter tonight at least. I am going to have to BOOK IT to Henderson Hills Baptist Church, I am driving from Downtown OKC to Britton and May to drop Matt off at ZT's for the member event there and then I get to drive, but not speed, to I-35 to head north to this church. Just hope I wont be too late tonight.

Faith and growth.

Lately I have been feeling like my faith has not been strong and that I just can't not seem to grow in the Lord. It is very frustrating and very defeating.

My mind has been on eternity lately with the passing of my grandad and not knowing for sure if he was a believer. So I feel very bad for never asking either.

Trying to find my way is hard. Especially doing on my own.

Praying that I will be able to learn to grow in Christ, and to feel like I am worthy to grow in Christ, having other people believe that I can grow in Christ would be nice.

Those three people that never believed I could be on God's will keep coming to mind. I need to get that tape out and replace it with positive words of affirmation. Just not quite sure how to start doing that.

Maybe my grandmother has words of wisdom in her bible that she gave me.

Fathers day

So fathers day was un eventful. Matt wax at work ( yes work) more on that in a diff blog post. I told him happy fathers day before I left for church, fixed him dinner that night when he got home.

Got a text from him regarding Fathers day and the fact that neither child told him happy fathers day. My husband is (in my opinion) the best father he kids could have. He dis not deserve to be forgotten on this day. I wish I had had more money to get him something he really wanted. But alas I could not.

There are other issues regarding his family that added to this frustration.

I am just having to pray that the children will see how bad this hurts their daddy.

I Also have to try not to think about the fact that it seems the son admires the step father more than his biological father. I have to pray that Matt will cling to his heavenly father to fill any void that might be there from the son and the times that the don would rather be away from his dad.

Just kills me that Mart had to go through this. It is times like these that I want to have a child with Matt so he could feel the love of a child the way that his two do not express to him.

Ok enough of that. Just pray for Matt, and the kids and me.

Thank you

always thinking

So I am always thinking of ways to bring in extra income into our household without taking to much extra time from my family (Matt really since Z is starting to have his own life) I have tried selling Scentsy, that proved to be to stressfull for the non saleswoman that I am. I had a friend on facebook that had mentioned Lia Sophia as a business opportunity but then again that is a direct selling type of business. I don't want to get a part time job. I like doing crafts but I don't know how good I am at crafts to make money off of doing crafts. I love looking at others crafts but I am not super creative to think of thiings myself. I have found the website Etsy and I love looking around but not sure if I could be creative enough to make a substantial amount of money (to offset income) from things I like to do. I am hoping that God will reveal to me ways to supplement our income.

So I hope that between budgeting and thinking of ways to make etra money maybe life will get just a little less tight.