July 4th Weekend

Hello,

July 4th weekend was awesome. On our way to KC MO we stopped at Cassoday, KS which had a sign stating that they were the prairie chicken capital of the world. Nothing was open, we got a picture of the sign and moved on to Emporia and found a cafe that was open so we could get breakfast. We had been driving since 3:30 that morning. so by 8 we were tired of being in the car and ready to get out and eat. We got done eating and headed to KC MO.

Not only did we see fireworks (two nights) we had a relaxing weekend. We went to KC MO, got there Saturday afternoon spent the afternoon in the pool and then had dinner at the Skies restaurant, it is an amazing revolving restaurant at the top of the Hyatt in KC MO. While we were finishing our dinner we got to see fireworks all around the downtown area for miles around the city. It was amazing. It was a great birthday celebration for Matt's 40th, I felt bad that I did not do anything for him with friends and family, but lately friends and family are few and far between.

We loved downtown KC MO, there were lofts everywhere for sale. If there was a position open at the KC MO Hyat we would move and live in the heart of downtown.

Matt and I got tattoo's on Monday July 5 2010. I got a cross on my wrist and Matt got Song of Solomon 6:3a on his fore arm (both on the left arm). He got "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine" in Hebrew permanetly tattoo'd on him. He is an amazing man. I love him with all my heart and more than I did when we married Oct 9 2004.

BTW, tattoo's HURT really bad...... I will not be getting another one. I barely made it through the cross. But there are no regrets. The tattoo is a physical reminder to me that Matt and I are bonded together by God and my faith in the trinity.

It is also something that Matt and I experienced together. It took a lot of thinking and talking my self into getting my self permanently marked. I am glad that I chose something that I believe in.

On Sunday morning Matt and I went to the City Market, it is a farmers market and they had other shops to buy things, restaurants and the like. It was fun. When we got back to the hotel we had a surprise in our room. Hyatt in KC MO is one of the hotels that I do the receivables for, The accounting staff had signed a card and sent a bottle of wine and some other food stuffs for Matt and I to enjoy, It was amazing. They are the best accounting staff ever.

On Sunday night we went to a movie not far from our hotel. It was great, we saw grownups and it was a good movie. We got to see fireworks from our hotel window, several miles away all around the downtown area.

Monday morning we woke up went downtown area to find a place to eat breakfast and start our day. EVERYTHING was closed except for Denny's, so we ate at Denny's then went back to the downtown area and waited for the tattoo parlor to open. Got back to the hotel around 4 that afternoon and just relaxed the rest of the day.

Tuesday morning we woke up, packed got everything ready to leave and went down to meet the accounting staff. I had talked to them lots now I had a face to put with a voice.

We visited for a bit, Matt and I went back upstairs to our room did one last sweep to make sure that we had everything and then headed on our way home.

On our way home we stopped at a winery, it was kinda small but really cool. Bought a wine glass from that stop to commemorate it. We stopped and filled up and headed home.

We stopped right after the OK border to get out of the car, have a picnic and rest outside of the car for just a bit. The breeze from the storm that was building was awesome. It was stuffy all weekend long due to the rain.

We got done with the picnic and headed home. We got back to our house around 8 that evening and pretty much went to bed.

Amazing relaxing weekend with the Man God brought to me and I would do it again (except for the tattoo, it really hurt)

June 16 2010

So today I realized that I have not been searching God to find out what my passion is. (Thank you AM). So now my prayer is help me find my passion. Once my passion has been defined by the way God made me I can move forward with that knowledge.

I am praying that I am patient and wait on God. I also pray that I will be open to exactly what my passion is. I need to make sure that I stay in prayer and God's word to really be in tune with what I am needing to be taught and hear from God.

Monday June 14 2010

I read Proverbs 14 tonight and verse 30 stuck out... it says...
"A heart at peace gives life to the body but envy rots the bones"

This verse really tells me that I need to be at peace with where God has me for the season he has me in. All around with job, friendships, finances etc. When I become at peace with what God has provided then I will be ready to be moved by God not before. His ways are not my ways, His ways are much better than mine, always has been always will.

sense of gratefullness

After watching a show about dr's in Haiti working on the people that needed it and hearing that a friend got a job that she had been praying about makes me very sad that I am not more grateful for the job that I believe that God brought me too.

My new prayer is to be grateful no matter what situation comes my way. There is no reason for me to grumble. So what if I lose a couple hours of pay. I am safe, my family is safe (I pray that my daughter is safe, we haven't heard from her in a couple of weeks.) we have food in the house and we have electricity. Even if we did not have electricity we have games that we could play as a family and hurricane lamps that would provide light and some heat.

So much more to life than the stupid little things I have been fretting about.

I pray that God will help me become a more grateful person in life.

feeling a sense of discontentment

Not sure if I really like this whole idea of blogging to just let anyone read the issues that I am going through especially if the people reading it (if anyone) are not really in my life. But I guess any prayers sent up are honored if the person is righteous. (you know the prayer of the righteous availith much).

So I am trying not to be ungrateful about my job but it feels lately like I am being babysat at work. Phone calls are being monitored, emails are being monitored. I am not a working adult that needs to be watched over to make sure that I am working.

I know that I can find all the answers in the Bible and throught prayer but I feel very unsure of everything right now.

I need to start reading the Bible daily and spending all of my extra time in prayer. This feeling is not a settling feeling.

Do you ever feel like there is something more? That is what I am feeling right now.

Will lean on God for the answer and will try my hardest to fight the urge to move with out the guidance and direction from the Father first.

Anniversary

Our Five year anniversary is on Friday, October 9, We celebrated early by going out to dinner last night at the Coach House. This was a very special night. I had mentioned going somewhere for date night /anniversary night, but could not decide on a place. I finally text Matt and tell him I don't care where we go or what we do just as long as we are together. Well I get home and he tells me to get ready that we have some place to go. Instead of asking questions (like we all know I usually would have) I just got ready and we went.

He drove us straight to the Coach House. We had a great quiet dinner, loved every minute with him. We got deserts (one for him and one for me, of course we shared) They had written Happy Anniversay on the plate in chocolate. It was great.

As we are sitting there getting ready to start eating, he looks around and says that something is missing. I look at him like he has lost his mind, nothing was missing on the table. Well after he said that he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a box. That sneaky man went and bought me a gift. I was beyond surprised.

I opened the box and there was a very pretty silver bracelet with a sapphire heart attached.

Needless to say I LOVE IT!!!! My husband has such good taste in jewlery.

It was all in all a great evening. I can not wait to celebrate Oodles and OOdles of more anniversaries with him.

Ladies Retreat

I was given the opportunity to join the women's retreat from Council Road at the Sullivant Center out in Norman.

I was not planning on going because of homework and I am kinda a homebody. I like to be with Matt.

Let me tell you it was with much anxiety and coaxing from Matt that I went.

I am so glad I did. Not only did I have a night that was eye opening but it was strangely relaxing being away from the house. (The guys had a night just to themselves).(They need that just as much as I do).

One thing that me being there afforded me was the realiziation that I hate Matt's disability. I deal with it because I love him and God brought us together, and that is my duty as his wife. But I had realized that ever since all this started (around April of 2005) I had not "dealt" with this disability, and I was mad at God.

As I was listening to the testimony of a very dear woman, I realized that she had felt the same way I had felt back then and even to this day. Alone, unloved, uncared for, This realization makes me cry as I type this because I know that is not true. It is a ploy of satan to get us to take our focus off of Him who matters most. I am truly saddened to say that this took me 4 1/2 years to figure out. Still not quite over it, but really who does get over the fact that her 39 year old husband is physically not the man she married almost 5 years ago. Does that mean I love him any less. No. I love him more today than the day I married him. I have never been more blessed than to be his wife. People might find that strange just becuase they see him having difficulty and they probably want to give us pity. Not the right reaction. God is letting us deal with this for a specific reason. Just not sure what that reason is right now. You never know it could be a ministry opportunity later on.

So needless to say the retreat was right where God wanted me. It was time for me to deal with my feelings regarding this. I have been a happier person since then. I know that God is in control and I don't feel that I am alone anymore, because I have openend my heart and mind and I am trying to embrace this season of life that I am in even though it is very hard. I know God can and will bring me through this life lesson with many things to share.